Ode to the Late Bloomers

When I was growing up we had a book called Leo the Late Bloomer. Leo was a young tiger who wasn’t talking or reading or writing as early as the other tiger cubs. His dad was worried but his mom trusted that ultimately he’d catch up and shine. And guess what: he did!

I’m an avid student of history, and I’ve come across many stories of “Leos” that have made me wonder whether we’re asking too much of kids too young. A few names that you might recognize who were middling students throughout high school and even into their university years: Franklin D. Roosevelt, John F. Kennedy and even the great international statesman Winston Churchill. The prolific and much-decorated author (and inventor) Roald Dahl was reportedly a terrible student and troublemaker who never attended college. Other more recent examples of poor students who became political and business leaders include Richard Branson,, Al Gore, John Kerry and Joe Biden.

Now it’s true that most of the people listed above went to elite universities because of family connections or high social status. But I think that’s a red herring. The larger point is that many people who do great things in the world don’t become who they are - motivated, hard-working, articulate, creative, brave - until they’re adults. I think we’ve lost sight of that in America today, and I’m worried about the long-term consequences on individual and societal levels.

Full disclosure: I have three dogs in this fight - my wonderful, silly, sweet and hopelessly disorganized sons. Homework time with my boys sounds something like this: “so we’re working on the quadratic equation in...wait, is that a feather...what time is baseball again...what’s for dinner...um, working on the quadratic equation in...um….math.” I’ve spent a lot of time reading about the development of boys. I can report that there’s mounting evidence on a neurobiological level that boys develop significantly later than girls. This has significant consequences in the classroom right from the beginning. For example, for reasons that seem mostly ego-driven, we’re pushing ever-downward the age that we expect kids to read in spite of the fact that the best education systems in the world, including Finland, don’t introduce reading until the age of 7. In contrast, it’s the rare American kindergarten classroom that isn’t pushing reading on its kids. This isn’t as much a problem in affluent communities, where it’s common to hold back kids a year before starting kindergarten. But for those who go to kindergarten on time, in the year they turn 5, school may start on a rocky footing. As one progressive educator and social scientist put it, trying to teach most boys to read at 5 is like trying to teach a girl to read at 3. Although some can do it, a lot can’t. This leaves a lot of boys feeling frustrated and angry and dumb, right from their first few months of formal schooling. Is it any wonder that so many boys hate school?

We’ve all heard about the epidemic of ADHD diagnoses, and there’s a segment of the medical and education communities that worry that we’re pathologizing the normal developmental characteristics of boys. One of my boys is a classic late bloomer. He’s bright and curious, but he has a lot of trouble conforming to expectations in the classroom. He spends an enormous amount of emotional energy following the rules at school, and really needs to run around for a couple hours before settling in for homework. But by that point he’s completely exhausted, mentally and physically. It’s no small wonder that homework time in our house is stressful and tiring for all of us. And, not surprisingly, my son views both homework and school as punishment, because that’s what he gets for being a normal young boy. For a time I blamed him, and tried to shoehorn him into his teachers’ expectations of what he should be doing. But now I blame our school and our society. I can’t tell you how often I hear adults expressing a desire to slow down time. Why are we so fixated on speeding up things for our kids?

I’m not trying to start a revolution, and I know how hard it is to change things on a cultural level. But I will tell you what I’m doing to try to mitigate some of the harm that school has created for one of my kids in particular. To start, I am relentlessly positive about my kids’ potential and intelligence. School is important, but it’s not a precise measure of capability or long-term prospects. The majority of schools today teach a knowledge-based system of learning that has its foundations in an educational philosophy from the 1800s. It’s very much about facts and dates. Things are slowly shifting as educators acknowledge that the skills needed for success in the 21st century innovation economy - including critical thinking, creative problem solving and collaboration - are not well cultivated in today’s model in the majority of American schools.

In addition, until my school changes its approach to learning I will need to supplement my kids’ education with opportunities that allow them to develop their 21st century skill-set. I’m starting with projects in our own community, and asking my kids to help become part of the solution to the problems they’re going to inherit someday. Our community is struggling to become more resilient to environmental challenges. What solutions can we think of to attack the bigger picture issues that are driving climate change, and what can we do in our small town to become more adaptable? I know that my children are smart and capable, and that there are no limits to what they will achieve in life. I need them to believe that too, even if that’s not the feedback that they’re getting at school. By equipping them with skills that they’re not necessarily acquiring in the classroom I’m achieving the dual purposes of empowering them to be forces for positive change and giving them the tools they need to be successful today and tomorrow. I’m also connecting them to and giving them a sense of investment in their community. Not every kid will be a standout student, but let’s not forget the many examples of those who went on to achieve great things in life anyway.